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  • Landlord Jeff

Pokemon Draft

I know a lot of people are still feeling the effects of the "Lion King" trailer, but I am still reeling from the "Detective Pikachu" trailer. I used to love Pokemon when I was a kid. I used to have the toys, cards, movies and books. I loved it and lived for it; eventually, however, I stopped keeping up with it in upper elementary school. That being said, when I watched the trailer a sort of pride and joy overcame me as all the great memories of discussing Pokemon with friends and family (even though most of the time they had no idea what I was talking about) came rushing back. Great memories were remembered from a much simpler time of waking on a Saturday morning to watch the Pokemon TV show, and for that I thank director Rob Letterman.

If you think for one second I won't be at the Thursday premier, you are sadly wrong. Hell, if someone bought me a Pikachu costume, I'd wear that. But, it's Wacky Wednesday and that means I need to speak about an obscure or fantasy sport. It also means I am going to turn this trip down memory lane into a sports blog. If you have ever watched Pokemon, you would know that if it were real it would be a very physical and taxing sport. So, I am entering my name in the first ever Pokemon Draft. Now, what is the Pokemon Draft? It's simple; you follow these rules ...

You get six picks, meaning you can only choose six Pokemon, due to traditional Pokemon rules which only allow you to carry 6 Pokemon. You can't choose the same one twice. You can't choose the youngest version of a Pokemon and say that it will eventually evolve. Example: If you choose a Bulbasaur, you choose a Bulbasaur. You can't say it will eventually evolve into a Venasaur; if you want a Venasaur, choose a Venasaur. You can choose both if you want, but that will be 2 of your picks.

The rules are simple, and I will start this inaugural Draft.

With the number 1 overall pick, The Landlord selects ... Pikachu.


Pick 1: Pikachu - I mean, it's a no brainer. Pikachu is a G; it is the franchise. It doesn't lose many battles, if any at all. One zap and you are down for the count. He is the ultimate underdog, always underestimated, but usually prevails. There is a question about his ability to fight ground Pokemon, as that is a weakness of his, BUT he is not affect by the ground type.

Pick 2: Snorlax - This big behemoth is billed at 6'11" and 1014.1 lbs. and is a personal favorite of mine. This monstrosity could anchor down the whole Alabama Crimson Tide offensive line. He can't be poisoned, which is awesome. Good luck if you are a fire and ice Pokemon because you won't be phasing my man Snorlax. There are questions about his laziness and drive and his ability to combat fighting-based Pokemon, but I say worst case scenario, he will make a great trampoline.

Pick 3: Gengar - This dude is the stuff of nightmares and is the same height as Danny DeVito. He is classified as a ghost and poison Pokemon, which is a good combo. His red glaring eyes and devilish grin would make anyone shit their pants when it's time to fight. In any team/entourage you have to have a wild card, and this boy is wild. Ground types can't phase him either, which is a plus. There is a question about his ability to beat psychic Pokemon, but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

Pick 4: Exploud: This thing is ugly and loud as hell. He is resistant to ghost Pokemon, so that could come in handy. Its main move is disarming voice, which means he is so loud he disarms people. His weakness is fighting-style Pokemon, but you can't fight if you are covering your ears and whaling in pain from the sonic blast. It can apparently blast fire too, which is an extra bonus. Exploud will be used as my back up muscle if Snorlax doesn't produce.

Pick 5: Sneasel: Now this sneaky little bastard is fast. If there is one thing Chip Kelly taught me during his tenure with the Oregon Ducks, it's that speed kills. Sneasel is quick, and he's a climber. He is sneaky and has a pretty good attack; his defense is weak, however. Good luck getting him though. I would say he is definitely my late round steal.

Pick 6: Meowth. Now, Meowth is one of my favorites because of his shit talking ability. On a team, you have to have a member who just moves his jaw and gets in the other team's head. When called upon, he can throw down, but he usually does lose. He likes to sneak and is light on his feet. But again, with my last pick it comes down to personality, and I need a guy to hype the others up while getting in the head of opponents. He is also one of the few Pokemon who can communicate with humans. I would never put Meowth in a Poke ball; he will be my right-hand man on our path to legend status.

This was fun, and I feel confident in my team. You don't have to go into the depth that I did breaking it down, but make sure to comment your 6 Pokemon roster in the comments section on the blog or on the Facebook link post.

Thanks for reading, and have a Wacky Wednesday.



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